Posts Tagged ‘Sexual immorality’

Forewarning, this is the message on my heart this morning, but it is one of personal (very female perspective) conviction: sexual immorality.

The story:

I wanted to scream at this lady.

For years I have avoided doctors to the best of my ability.  I attempted to shake off any illnesses or injuries with natural home remedies, prayer, and rest before resorting to visiting the doctor.

I now think, part of that is the “You are 18 (at the time of this event, 22), you must visit the ObGyn for your Pap Smear.”  The first time, I didn’t know what it was, so I asked. “Yuck, no thank you!” A childish answer, I understand, but valid for me at the time.

With illnesses and surgeries, I continued getting the question, then the request, and finally the heavily recommendation to go in for my annual (actually my first) check.

No thank you.

I moved again, and the doctor required it of me.  I was not looking forward to it, at all.  If ever I had feared something it was this.  I asked my roommates to pray with me, to clear my mind of worries and negative reflections I had developed towards myself due to this upcoming exam.

Some back story….

While on my tour of the Tower of London and Tower Bridge, I learned of the beheading of wives–royal brides–who did not bleed while consummating a marriage.

Muslim brides are also often executed for appearing “not virgin” on their wedding night.

And so for 6 years I have believed the value of offering virginity, in some cultures, to be life or death.

And the story continues…

My roommates knew how I valued the history I had learned and my desire to uphold the gift for my future husband.  They prayed with me and I drove to the doctors.

After an initial try, the lady went to get another (larger) tool.  My eyes were not having it, so I spoke up.  I was bewildered and unhinged by what came out of her mouth:

“Go home, make a warm bath, get comfortable…” Explicit, she was.  She advised me to masturbate.  To take my own virginity.  All for the sake of a medical exam.

No ma’am! As she went to get something, I changed and dashed out of that office as a gazelle runs from a lion.  Only here, she was not going to get me.

I was embraced.  God knew the conviction of my heart.

As I read this morning,

“So she seduced him with her pretty speech and enticed him with her flattery.  He followed her at once, like an ox going to the slaughter.  He was like a stag caught in a trap, awaiting the arrow that would pierce its heart. He was like a bird flying into a snare, little knowing it would cost him his life.  So listen to me, my sons, and pay attention to my words.  Don’t let your hearts stray away toward her. Don’t wander down her wayward path.  For she has been the ruin of many; many men have been her victims.  Her house is the road to the grave.  Her bedroom is the den of death” (Proverbs 7:21-27).

I understand this is a story of a woman’s husband who is out-of-town, an adulteress who seduces men away from their wives.  I am not that woman, and I am not that man, nor either of their spouses.  But I am convicted.

In a world where David Platt’s Counter Culture is given subtitles of “Same-Sex Marriage…Sex Slavery…Abortion,” and “Pornography,” where rights and laws are being advocated for the freedom of all peoples in a self-gratification-seeking, individualistic society, this scripture holds much more application.

I am that man, or rather one of the many men (verse 26).

Seduced by worldly possessions, pleasures, lustful thoughts and images.  They are too near to us at any given moment.  We shall not be ashamed to be as we are. FullSizeRender-1

If sexual abuse is a part of your testimony, your history, know that I am with you and am praying with you, for you.  Abba is a gracious Father, Jesus has called you His Bride and veils you with purity, with newness of life.  You are sacred to Him.

He is Righteous King, Prince of Peace, and He wore the crown of thorns.  His blood shed, so ours does not.  Our crown: He calls us daughters, princesses, gems.  We are precious.

Wear the crown.  Accept the veil, the washing, the purification.
Today is Good Friday.  Christ has suffered so that we shall have life with Him.
Whether we bleed, we endure persecution.  From family, friends, co-workers, doctors, strangers, teachers, and political extremists.
Proverbs is a book of wisdom, and I pray each of us continues through our day knowing and trusting in what Jesus has taught us, what God has inspired and written to us in His Book.
May we stand firm in the Truth, rooted deep in the compassion of Christ, serving friends and foes alike, humble to wash their feet and humble in receiving good gifts and acts of service.  May God’s blessings be richer than gold.  May the words spoken, be as sweet as honey–not for the tempting of man, but for the praising of Christ Jesus.  His name is power, and divine He is.  Forever and ever, Amen.

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“Ten Cross-Centered Commandments for Entertainment and Social Media”, David Platt:

May you set aside the time to study these scriptures and ask God where you may need to make changes in the use of your time.

“If we have been crucified with Christ and Christ lives in us, then how does that effect the way we approach entertainment and social media?”

  1. Fear God
    • “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction” (Proverbs 1:7).
    • “The eyes of the LORD are in every place, keeping watch on the evil and the good” (Proverbs 15:3).
  2. Flee sexual immorality
    • Flee sexual lust– wrongful sexual desires yourself
      • “But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Matthew 5:28).
    • Flee sexual immodesty– provoking wrong sexual desires in others
      • “It is good not to eat meat or drink wine or do anything that causes your brother to stumble” (Romans 14:21).
      • “…likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, but with what is properfor women who profess godliness–with good works” (1 Timothy 2:9-10).
        • This is a lesson I feel nearly all women must face in young adulthood.  I remember my sophomore year of high school (before I knew Christ), my friend had to tell me why my boyfriend just removed me from sitting on his lap at a football game.  I had no concept of sexual-anything. Then, freshman year of college, a brother in Christ took me aside one day to talk about hugging.  He had struggled through addition to pornography and shared that when we hugged it was a lure to consider his old ways.  I had a similar conversation about necklines on shirts and dresses.  Today, when around my brother (21 and doesn’t know the Lord), I sometimes get complimented on clothing and other times get called Amish.  Nonetheless, I know that my clothing should not lead someone astray.  I know girls, we also have our weakness, especially at the beach, gym, etc.  This is a concern, may we be strengthened in a way that strengthens others: modest (Proverbs 27:17).
    • Flee sexual allurement- including inappropriate emotional attachment outside of marriage
      • “Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life” (Proverbs 4:223).
      • “My son, be attentive to my wisdom; incline your ear to my understanding, that you may keep discretion, and your lips may guard knowledge.  For the lips of a forbidden woman drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil, but in the end she is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two-edged sword.  Her feet go down to death; her steps follow the path to Sheol; she does not ponder the path of life; her ways wander, and she does not know it” (Proverbs 5:1-6).
    • Flee sexual looking outside of marriage
      • “I have made a covenant with my eyes; how then could I gaze at a virgin? What would be my portion from God above and my heritage from the Almighty on high?  Is not calamity for the unrighteous, and disaster for the workers of iniquity?  Does not he see my ways and number all my steps?” (Job 31:1-4).
      • “Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous (Hebrews 13:4).
    • Flee entertainment that exalts, glamorizes, jokes around about, and/or makes light of sex outside of marriage
      • Ephesians 5:3-12
  3. Speak wisely
    • “Either make the tree good and its fruit good, or make the tree bad and its fruit bad, for the tree is known by its fruit.   You brood of vipers! How can you speak good, when you are evil? For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks” (Matthew 12:33-34).
    • “And now, O sons, listen to me: blessed are those who keep my ways.  Hear instruction and be wise, and do not neglect it.  Blessed is the one who listens to me, watching daily at my gates, waiting beside my doors.  For whoever finds me finds life and obtains favor from the LORD, but he who fails to find me injures himself; all who hate me love death” (Proverbs 8:32-36).
    • Think before you speak
      • Proverbs 10:19, 11:22, 13:3, 15:28, 17:28, 18:2, 21:23, 26:23, 29:11, 29:20; James 3:5-10
      • “Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God” (James 1:19-20).
        • Will what I say adorn the gospel?
          • Proverbs 15:23, 16:13; Titus 2:9-10
          • “Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body: (Proverbs 16:24).
          • “At the same time, pray also for us, that God may open to us a door for the word, to declare the mystery of Christ, on account of which I am in prison–that I may make it clear, which is how I ought to speak.  Walk in wisdom toward outsiders, making the best use of the time.  Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person” (Colossians 4:3-6).
        • Will what I say glorify God?
          • “Let the words of my moth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O LORD, my rock and my redeemer” (Psalm 19:14).
          • Matthew 5:13-16
    • Avoid evil and angry speech
      • Proverbs 10:11, 12:18, 15:18, 18:6, 20:3, 25:23
    • Avoid retaliatory and inflammatory speech
      • Proverbs 17:14, 20:22, 23:9, 26:17, 29:8
    • Avoid gossip and slander
      • Proverbs 10:18, 16:27-28
      • “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear…Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you” (Ephesians 4: 29-32).
    • Avoid grumbling and complaining
      • “Do all things without grumbling or disputing, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world” (Philippians 2:14-15).
    • Avoid saying on a screen what you wouldn’t say in person
      • 2 Corinthians 10:8-11
  4. Communicate honestly
    • Proverbs 12:17-22, 19:9, 25:14, 1 Corinthians 4:5
    • “All the ways of a man are pure in his own eyes, but the LORD weighs the spirit” (Proverbs 16:2).
  5. Cultivate humility
    • Proverbs 11:2, 20:6, 24:17-18, 27:2, 29:23, 30:32; Mark 8:34-36; 2 Timothy 3:2;
    • “…Humble yourself before the Lord, and he will exalt you” (James 4:6-10).
  6. Have accountability
    • Proverbs 5:7-13, 13:1, 19:20, 19:27, 27:17; Hebrews 10:24
  7. Maintain mastery
    • “‘All things are lawful for me,’ but not all things are helpful. ‘All things are lawful for me,’ but I will not be dominated by anything” (1 Corinthians 6:12).
    • Galatians 5: 16-26
  8. Guard your heart
    • “Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life” (Proverbs 4:23).
    • From envy and jealousy
      • “But godliness with contentment is great gain…” (1 Timothy 6:6).
      • Philippians 4:11-13
    • From pride and ambition
      • “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others” (Philippians 2:3-4).
    • From unhealthy friendships and unhelpful associations
      • Proverbs 1:10-16, 4:14-15, 12:26, 13:20
      • “Do not be deceived: ‘Bad company ruins good morals”‘ (1 Corinthians 15:33).
  9. Renew your mind
    • “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect” (Romans 12:2).
    • Beware of falsehood
      • Romans 16:17-18, Colossians 2:8, 2 Timothy 4:3, 2 Peter 2:1
    • Beware of filth
      • “I will not set before my eyes anything that is worthless.  I hate the work of those who fall away; it shall not cling to me” (Psalm 101:3).
      • Proverbs 2:12-22
      • “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things” (Philippians 4:8).
    • Beware of frivolity
      • Proverbs 12:11, 15:14, 26:18-19;  1 Peter 1:24-25
  10. Redeem your time
    • Ephesians 5:15-16, Proverbs 10:26, 14:23, 19:15, 24:30-34, 28:19
    • Make the most out of every opportunity
      • Acts 17:17-18, Colossians 4:5
    • Don’t neglect other priorities
      • “But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you” (Matthew 6:33).
        • Your time at work (2 Thessalonians 3:11-12)
        • Your time to rest (Psalm 127:2, Mark 6:32)
        • Your time with people (Matthew 22:39)
        • Your time with God (Matthew 22:37)

And always pray without ceasing (1 Thessalonians 5:17)

*These are compiled from David Platt’s Session 4 sermon from Secret Church 2014.  All black font is exact, sometimes shortened, but the integrity of his sermon notes remains.  I have added commentary in a separate color.

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March 22, 2014

We are identified as the children of a perfect Father, not by our own short-comings.

Recently, I spoke with a dear brother in Christ about the transformation of his heart.  For seven years his relationship with his girlfriend-turned-fiance was his priority.  He convinced himself that with marriage in their future, it was okay to practice God’s design of intimacy within their dating years.  When she broke it off, he was shattered.   Three years later, his proclamation of Jesus Christ as Savior and Redeemer is truly his joy.  Now with the opportunity to share, he revealed the Lord’s transformation from confessed sinner to redeemed follower of Jesus Christ:

“Draw near to God.. it is the most important tool to get through times of hurt.

Testimony will bring light into someone else who is going through hurt so that they will find a path of hope, peace, and joy.

Out of every negative, make two positive thoughts out of it.

If you really love someone you are not going to guilt trip them, you will not lead them somewhere they will one day regret.

How are you going to make it, so that next time you will not be victimized?

Advised steps: 1.  Admit “I’m a broken, sinful person;” 2. Rely on Christian Friends; 3. Rely on prayer, God, and the Bible;   4. Trust that God loves me the same as He did before I made the mistakes

You are not less of a person.  We are all broken people.  You can’t look into the mirror and see yourself as anything less than what God sees.  Ultimately, God is going to use you as He has planned.  Seek God’s Word.  Seek God.

How are you going to use this to benefit God’s Kingdom?  It is not your own story, rather, it is God’s.  Allow Him to use it.

In a future relationship, he will love you in all your imperfections.  He should accept the past trials and the transformation of who God has made you.  And when God has you in that relationship, you will thank the Lord for removing you from this painful relationship.  He knew all that would happen in your life, and He promises to never forsake you (Joshua 1:5).

God will heal you, and you will be able to use your healing to help someone who is currently experiencing this hurt in life.

Ultimately He is the one who has suffered the greatest amount of pain, as He did on the cross, in order for us to receive His grace and salvation.”

My prayer is that the life of this follower of Christ is able to encourage you through your own personal struggles, as you claim Jesus Christ as your guide to salvation.

Songs to consider in receiving God’s grace:

Jeremy Camp’s “This Man” and Jimmy Needham’s “Forgiven and Loved”

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